Vernal, Utah

What a crazy two months it has been. But we have everything pretty much packed and placed where it fits the best and looking like a home. Our adventure in moving was quite interesting, but it has been a good change over all.

First of all I was on the truck with Brandon for one week (and I totally got to go to Canada!) Yay! That was actually pretty fun, exciting and good because we had a lot to discuss to figure out our move to Utah and it was SO nice to be able to communicate in person.

I got home from the truck and had 5 days to pack my house (technically one 4 because the 1st day was Sunday and I didn't have any boxes and I wasn't going to go hunting for them on the Sabbath). I did it though. Luckly many boxes were still packed from our move back to Rexburg because I had a feeling we weren't going to be staying there for a really long time (although I did think it would have been longer then it was lol).

I got all the packing and most the cleaning done. Thursday morning my mom and dad showed up to help load the truck and finished with the cleaning. Then Brandon actually was able to unload that day so he was able to meet up with me and we drove the truck and our car to my parents house. We stayed the night there and woke up extra early the next morning to head to Vernal. Man those u hauls sure use a lot of gas! But after a CRAZY curvey, hilly road we made it to Vernal only 1 hour later then we had planned. We did our inspection and signed rent papers and started the unloading of the truck. Thank goodness to my Dad, Brandon and our new Bishop. My mom helped me start putting things away and most importantly making beds so that no matter what we could have a comfy place to sleep that night. After eating dinner with my parents they had to head out and our living room looked like too much of a daunting task. So my dear husband suggested we go explore our new surroundings just a bit and see the town. I willingly agreed and we left for a bit and then came back a few hours later and started unpacking. Figuring we had at least 500 sq feet more then we were used to it was actually kind of fun finding places to put things and having, well lets just say, more then one closet full of storage. but it all fits into THIS house we don't have to have a shed or storage unit or anything :) I was even able to unpack some things I had packed a long time ago and forgotten about :D

Well Saturday we unpacked more and for a break we went and found the library! We can't live without the library (well Tamina and I can't anyway). We got a card and some books and admired the two story, huge building filled with books just for us to read!

Sunday we met our new ward (which is much smaller then our ward in Rexburg) The people all seemed rather friendly, and made us feel welcome. We also took up the saying "Day of Rest" and all relaxed and enjoyed just not worrying about all the boxes for a while. For the next 4-5 days I finished unpacking as Brandon started work that Monday. We have felt so welcomed by people as the Elders Quorum stopped by, as well as the bishopric, and even the missionaries, over the course of that week and the next. Thankfully none of them started stopping by until at least the boxes in the living room were put away so it looked like we had all moved in even though there were boxes stashed in all the other rooms lol.

It has taken us a while to get adjusted and used to things here. Some things are so nice (like having a Joann's, Ross, Lowes, Super Walmart, and other places like those within a 5 mile radius) and also being able to walk to many places is a nice change that we have welcomed. Tamina LOVES the  stroller.

There will always be things that we will miss about the other places we have lived, but we feel so blessed to be where we are, and feel this is where our family is supposed to be. There aren't many neighbors that are members of the church so that will provide us with some good missionary/ testimony building experiences :) I sure do miss some of my dearest friends, but with time I'm sure we will be able to make some new friends here, although they will in no way replace our old friends. It is hard to feel like some friends have been lost (and I really have a hard time with that) but I know that the friendships that will remain will be there no matter the distance between us. I have made some amazing friends in my life travels and I will always treasure them no matter how far they may live from me.

Well I don't have many pictures yet but I will work on taking more. I have lots of just Tamina but that doesn't really show where we live or anything lol. I'll get some so people can see. I will say this, the mountains here are beautiful! We are doing well and I will post again soon with some pictures :)

Hope, may it never fade.

Well I've been writing this for a few weeks but I don't have the time to sit and write and I am much faster at typing, so please bare with me for a bit. I just wanted to write a post and let people know that hope never fades, even in all the turbulence and difficulties of the life we live in today. Hope is always there and we may always find joy even in heartache.

I think of this as I am thinking of Easter coming up and the wonderful blessing of knowing that the Savior has been resurrected and that some day I will be to. On that day I look forward to seeing my grandfather again and his wonderful smile, as well as some other friends, and to seeing and meeting the cutest little boy I have dreamed of holding for 4 years, but I know they will be waiting and so excited for us to be able to live together as a family for the rest of eternity.

Hope is never gone, Christ is an example of this. When we feel we can't find it please know that there are people: family, friends, neighbors, etc. who care and who will be your strength to lean on while facing difficult times. I know that there are people out there who have it worse then I do, but for me I feel my life has been sufficiently difficult for my strength and I know I have much to still improve before I am able to go and meet my maker. Our Father in Heaven loves each of us so much and he knows our strengths and our weaknesses, and gives us these times of difficulty to strengthen us and bring us closer to Him.

I have had many great family and friends in my life as I have gone through different trials. I have a hard time opening up to people to let them in to help me when I am struggling. I know it is an issue of pride especially when someone has felt the prompting of the spirit to make a special visit/phone call to me out of the blue. It is times like that, that I remember that pride must be set aside and that person has been sent there as an answer to a prayer. I may not need to tell them why I am having a difficult day, but the fact that they listened and are there on my doorstep/phone is a reminder that I have a Heavenly Father and he is giving me hope by sending that person. I must say that my loss of pregnancies and difficulties getting pregnant has brought me closer to my husband most of all, and closer to my Heavenly Father and the hope that the atonement brings. There are times I wish I could just cuddle in a ball and let the pressure of depression and self pity overcome me, but I remind myself at those times that Jesus Christ is there. This doesn't mean there aren't times when I have cried myself to sleep, not been able to sleep, felt sorry for myself, or just done nothing for a day because I have felt no desire or strength to do so, but I don't let those feelings stay and I remember the blessings that I have received in life. It is in these times of sorrow and despair that it is hardest to remember our blessings and to seek them out.

I have recently wondered as I have talked to many friends who have also suffered through similar trials of mine; are these types of trials are becoming more common for some reason, or if I was just blind to the many people who suffer these trials because of how young or how little I knew before?

I like to try and stay positive but there have been times in my life when it has been particularly difficult, the loss of some pregnancies, difficulty with getting pregnant, finances, being a good wife and mother, not being quick to loose patience or quick to anger, etc. Lets just say the list could go on, but that's not important. Through it all the savior has been there to lift me up, remind me that he has felt my pain and afflictions, and there is hope I just need to keep pushing on the doing the best I can.

There are a few scriptures I love at times when I am feeling down.
Alma 32:21 - ...Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if he have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true.
Alma 34:41 - But that he have patience, and bear with those afflictions, with a firm hope that ye shall one day rest from all your afflictions.
Hebrews 11:1 - Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

I can't imagine all that Christ suffered, I mean he suffered and felt the pains of every single person who has, is, and will live on this earth. I have felt his assurances in my life, I know he has felt and understands all that I go through, and at this time nearing when we celebrate his resurrection I always remember this. He actually knows what I feel and fear and hope and EVERY emotion. I have no need to feel alone or misunderstood because there is one who always knows, understands and knows how to find and feel that hope again.

So at this time of year, as well as all year long. Hope should never fade. Looking back at some trials I see they were actually blessings in disguise and that if I had not passed through it I would not have treasured the things I do now, like my precious daughter. The way the world is going today it seems hope is quickly cast aside when faced with afflictions, but Christ didn't suffer all he did for us to forget him. He is and will always be there for us because HE LIVES and HE LOVES us. Find faith and keep pressing on because maybe in the end of this life we will all be able to look back and see what wonderful strength we gained through trials and what a wonderful life we had because of our trials. It is hard, he never said it would be easy, but it will be so worth it in the end when we are able to live as an eternal family forever and see those loved ones we miss while they are not here on earth with us.

I am writing this more as a reminder to myself, something I can come back and reflect on, for when I am going through those trials and need to be reminded that my savior loves me and has blessed me richly and all I have to do is keep pressing on. I know I am not perfect, rather far from it, but I have hope that through all my shortcoming I will be able to be as Christ and live again some day. What A Blessing!

Afton and Back to Rexburg

Well Surprise for those who did not know that we had (or would be) moving back to Rexburg. We are grateful to be back and to get to enjoy those friendships which we had formed here, and missed. We love the ward we are in here and I would like to thank the many who have welcomed us back with open arms and made us feel important and like we are still part of the ward family. I love the experiences I have had and am grateful to be able to recognize the special importance that a simple hello, welcome back, we are excited to see you again, welcome... ect. can mean to somebody, whether they are a member or not.

We got welcomed back into our trailer by having a mouse in the house. Not necessarily the welcome we would have liked, but I guess in a way it just helped to make sure everything was clean and cloroxed down before we put everything away lol. Brandon has been a good sport about checking the traps whenever I ask him to do for me cause, although I will do it without complaint when he is gone, I am glad he can at least do it while he is here :)

The warm weather has been wonderful and the play dates also. Tamina has really enjoyed getting to see her friends, well I have also.

I learned so much while I was able to be with my mom, and I hope it has made it so I will be a better mother and wife also. My mom is so inspiring, I am so grateful to have her example. She is constantly going and always helping out others and she never thinks of herself. Sometimes I honestly don't know how she does it. I have tried to follow in many of her footsteps, and although I know I fall very short, being next to her inspired me once again to continue to strive to be better. How my mom has the energy, patience, love, grateful attitude, non-wavering faith, and so much more I mean come on she runs a farm and does so much with my siblings and me and still finds time to cook meals, offer service, walk every day... I don't know how she is so good at it all, all the time! I have regained some patience and it just felt nice to be with  my siblings for a while. I don't know my younger siblings like I do us older ones and I LOVED getting to know them and see their personalities and just their awesomeness. I also LOVED being close to my other brother as well and his family so I could get to know them better as well. He has a great family and Tamina and his youngest sure had a blast getting to know eachother better. I look forward to trips home and the get togethers :) My mom is able to do so much while my dad is away and  although I try so hard I know Tamina misses out cause I get exhausted. Brandon is away for days at a time, and it seems to wear me out by the time he gets home and yet when my dad gets home my mom still just keeps going. She is a hero of mine.

I am so grateful for eternal families and knowing that we get to all be together for an eternity. Not only my husband, myself, and kids but my siblings and parents also.

Moving Back

Well, We have moved back to Rexburg for a time. We are excited about our new adventures as Brandon has taken a new job. Our duration of time in Rexburg is up in the air right now, but we are so excited for us to be able to experience this change. It is for the better for our family and I love him so much for trying to always look out for what is the best for us.

Tamina has had a wonderful time (as have I) living up in Star Valley. Thursday was a bitter sweet day as it was my last day at the Library. I have learned a lot from the ladies I worked with and I was able to remember that I can and am a good worker and have value in that way also, with working with the public and coworkers. It was great to create some friends and spend some fun times with my family. We have had some great times with my family and it was wonderful to get to know my younger siblings better. Here are some fun pictures:

 I think we have a dentist on our hands :)

 She loved going swimming at the Rec Center in Jackson Hole.

 I just love this picture I caught of her, It just shows her cute personality and spunk.

 Sunday naps after church :)

 She sat and watched the baby chicks for like half an hour, just watching over them and making sure they were okay. 

She sure loves Grandma, what a great shot of both of them :)

It is nice to be back in our place, on our own, but family will be missed. It is exciting to not have to work and just get to play and help Tamina grow and experience life. She is such a bundle of joy still and she always reminds me to see the simple things in life and be excited about them. In fact today we got snow dumped on us and we had to build a snow man, lol. She LOVES to be outside and just run and play.

I hope I can live up to all she loves to do. Many times I feel in adequate to be her mother and sometimes I am so exhausted that I don't do the many things I should or have the patience she deserves. Being a mother is a full time job and I would never trade it for anything in the world, but I am thankful to also know that I don't have to be perfect, because I am far from it. I am so glad to have such a special spirit though and know that I have been able to be entrusted with her care and feel of her love.

Family

We are so thankful for our wonderful daughter. She is now 2! YAY! The time has flown by and sometimes I catch myself just looking at her and wondering how in the world she grew up so fast. I know she is just going to keep growing and I don't know where all the time goes.
I love being a mother, the happiest day of my life was two years ago (besides when I got married to Brandon of course). We have had many ups and downs but I never regret those two decisions of my life. Being a wife and mother is what I live for and I am so grateful my Heavenly Father has seen me fit for both of these life callings. I honestly don't know what I would do without these two special people in my life.
I find myself often comparing myself or my family to other families that I see, and become hard on myself and then I have to realize that we each grow and learn and develop at different paces. Although I may not be the perfect wife or the perfect mother I am definitely trying and that is the best that can be expected of me, that I try my best. Each day I get to wake up and have a new start and try my best each and every day. Families are not perfect and we many times find ourselves comparing us to what we see at others, comparing our worst with their best.... well it just isn't meant to be. We shouldn't compare ourselves and our weaknesses to those of others. Everyone has their faults and their weaknesses and it is a challenge for each person in themselves to overcome. I am thankful for the people I have met in my life who know my weaknesses and my faults and do not judge me for them, but help me to want to be better.
Well I want to ponder on my sweet, adorable daughter for a bit. This post is after all about her and being a family. She made our family feel whole and she has learned a lot over two years. She talks a bit and loves to play games. She always says please and thank you and has learned the true meaning of HOT. Her favorite toy is Lady (which her father gave her) and she loves blankets and pillows. If she sees a blanket and/or pillow she asks for them and wants to be cuddled in them. I LOVE it because that is when I can get in some good cuddles with her to because other then that she is usually too busy running around. She is really starting to enjoy coloring and is slowly learning her colors. Her favorites to say are blue, purple or red. She is already in 3T clothes but is mostly because she is tall. Her hair is coming in very thick and when it is wet it curls at the ends. She has so many comical faces and emotions that sometimes I can't help but just laugh. She is quite animated. Recently she has started drawing a picture on her art easel and then when she is done she steps to the side and says ta da! It is pretty cute.
She also loves to help me, with anything. She helps to clean the house, dishes, her room, etc. She enjoys sewing while sitting on my lap or my moms lap and she loves going outside. She loves sledding and petting her puppy Bella. She is potty trained to :) We still have accidents but they are becoming less and less and she is loves that she gets to be a big girl.
Brandon and I couldn't be happier with our angel and all she is doing. She truly is a joy. I don't know what our lives would be without her and I don't want to imagine because she keeps me going at times :).